He was determined to offer something more than amputation to soldiers injured after World War II and the frame helped them to grow new bone. I was in hospital at the time having my appendix removed, and my mother was in the waiting room when Richard was wheeled past.Eventually, when he was 40, the pain in Richard's leg became so bad that he was referred to St Peter's Hospital, Chertsey, where it was discovered that he had osteomyelitis, an infection of the fibula, a bone of the lower leg, as a result of the accident.Antibiotics are generally ineffective for this condition and the orthopaedic surgeon, Rowen Pool, proposed surgery to remove the infected part of the bone.Richard had three inches of infected bone sawn out of his leg, which was then broken lower down. For Richard, the frame provided the only chance of saving his leg.The amazing thing about the frame are the four-inch metal pins which had to be pushed right through Richard's leg and twisted by one millimetre every day to pull the bone up and make space for new growth. This caused my father to comment that he was glad to have two good legs (his little joke as he lost his right leg in France in 1944). Richard's leg caused him intermittent pain but during the next few years he was usually distracted by other smaller accidents involving panes of glass, ladders and knives; he once managed to dislocate his shoulder while lifting himself into an attic space. By the time my mother arrived he was conscious, and apologising for giving her yet another fright.
At the age of 15 his tendency to injure himself was legendary, but this was by far the worst incident. At the hospital his shattered left leg was pinned and plastered. He was in traction for months and, after some gruelling physio, left the hospital with a pronounced swagger as a result of the now shorter, misshapen left leg. One dark February morning 25 years ago my brother Richard and I set out on our paper rounds and within minutes he was hit by a car which lifted him off his bike, onto the bonnet, and through the windscreen.
As Lily Tomlin put it: "Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs".. Why so many? Who knows? Presumably they wouldn't be on the shelves if the likes of Mr Hickey and me didn't buy them. How could I have lived so long and yet experienced so little?And there's more. Did you know you can buy 73 general painkillers, 16 treatments for mouth discomfort, 34 muscular pain relievers, 50 stomach remedies, 29 laxatives, 15 antidiarrhoeals, 71 cold remedies, 23 sore throat soothers, 16 haemorrhoid helpers, 7 dandruff disguisers, 16 baby teething suggestions, 22 antiseptics, 32 zit creams, 16 fish oils and 35 dietary supplements? There are 78 remedies for coughs alone and Lemsip, I've discovered, aren't the only ones to manipulate the tickled. There, on page 63, are "Fennings Little Healers, for coughs with colds and catarrh Contains Ipecac 20mg". Now I've only ever used Ipecac to make children vomit when they've swallowed something indigestible, but I declined to pass this on to Mr Hickey, who was, in any case, asleep. Delving deeper into the directory, I discovered a cornucopia of silly names.
Doan's Extra Strength Backache Pills, Nurse Sykes' Powders, Indian Brandee, Jaaps Grape Saline Health Salts, Hofels Odourless One-a-day Garlic Tablets, Red Kooga Betalife and Potters Peerless Composition Essence... This fascinating publication is not one I'm familiar with, but it lists every product that any idiot might wish to buy for trivial, self-limiting illness. My GP (you know, the one with the heart condition) would have snuffed it on the spot at such a preposterous question, but I'm made of sterner stuff. "How the bloody hell should I know?" I barked, reflecting the question back at Mr Hickey, as I'd been taught to do in communication skills. He hadn't brought the tube with him ("It's white with green lettering and a yellow top") and had no idea what Mr Fenning put in his Little Healers.Just as I felt my chest tightening, I spied a discarded OTC directory on the smear trolley under the gallstones. Two bottles of it, at least.Today I felt much better and attacked my patients with renewed vigour.
